Chapter 2 - swelling up

I obviously still was a thin girl. I thought. Just not as tight and trim as I was before I agreed to this. I tried to make the movement of my body feel sexy, and eventually I sort of got into it. Maybe I would like being a curvy-thin girl?

I didn't get nervous until I saw my own stomach roll over the waistband of my jeans. Just barely, but you could see it. My jeans had been painful to wear lately- I knew they dug deeply into my stomach and back, usually leaving deep marks. I knew I only had two pairs that buttoned at all. But to see my body will enough extra fat piled on it to literally spill over my clothes?

You assured me that it was nothing, no one would have ever noticed it! You tuck the little bulge into my pants and notice how there is no room left for your hand to explore in there. I am red with embarrassment but also so desperate for you to f*ck me. You laugh and say that I have to wait until we are home, I'm too fat to get pleasured under the table anymore. I know it's all part of your fantasy, and I'm not actually FAT, but it still stings with shame. I get up to follow you out and notice the little bulge is back out. I cover it with my jacket, which doesn't want to zip anymore either. Maybe I am getting fat?

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A couple weekends later I approached you about getting some new clothes. I found a pair of jeans that my chubby friend Amanda had left at the house. They were now the only pants I could pull over my thighs. They didn't even button, I had to keep them together with a rubber band.

Amanda was always kind of fat.. there is no way I am as fat as her! I rationalize that she looked heavier bc she was shorter, she carried her weight badly, etc etc. And really it was just my thighs causing the problem, the rest of me was fine!

My thighs were a huge problem. They had grown thick as f*ck, bulging and wobbling in anything I wore. I had been concerned when my thigh gap was officially gone, but you said it was because my hips were so narrow. My hips were just as covered in "curves" as my gigantic thighs. But it wasn't really that much weight! It just showed up so much because I had been so thin. It probably just felt like a lot to you.

...when you are that deep in denial, you can rationalize anything