chapter 1: setting the scene for freshman year

I never really had a growth spurt in high school—I just started as a chubby 5’3 Freshman and every year grew a few inches to be a lanky 5’11 senior. Volleyball had always been my passion, and every year my position would change as I grew taller. By senior year I was a middle blocker, and helped lead the team to state. I was recruited by a bunch of division three schools, and ended up choosing Knox College in Illinois.

Shortly after high school graduation coach had all the incoming freshmen on campus for a huddle. She watched us bounce the balls, and then took detailed measurements of our bodies. I measured precisely 179cm tall which made me the second tallest incoming athlete, and at 60 kilograms was also the lightest. Coach made specialized workout plans for all of us to enter pre-season in optimal shape. He was excited that I was going to Wisconsin to help my cousins at their dairy farm, and suggested that I aim for a minimum 500 calorie surplus, supplement with creatine, plus a detailed weight lifting schedule to help me add some bulk. He also suggested I keep cardio down to a minimum, and intimated that the farm work alone would probably be enough. My shortest teammate, who outweighed me by five pounds at 5’3, was told to start running and give up her daily Coca-Cola and chocolate chip cookie habit. Before leaving we had a lunch with a bunch of other athletes, and I randomly sat next to a couple Cross-Country athletes. We joked about all being skinny, and there was one guy about my height with the cutest blue eyes who said that at 140 pounds he’d be the heifer on the team.

The summer passed quickly. We’d wake up before dawn to milk the cows (nothing tastes better than warm milk fresh from a cow), a hearty breakfast, farm work, a nice big lunch, then more work in the afternoon followed by dinner. It was fun working side-by-side along my two cousins. Nick was a couple years older than me and at 6’8 played Division I basketball; 6’6 Jason had played D1 too, but at 25 had filled in a bit since graduation. They both helped me lifting in their garage, and I tried to keep up with their appetites. We had a delightful time on the farm working hard, getting up early (and going to bed exhausted most nights at 7p or 8p.) It was more practical to go barefoot than to constantly have to clean our shoes, and of course I just wore t-shirts and gym shorts. They kept on teasing me about leaving early for pre-season in early August, but I knew it was good natured. On warm weekends, we’d occasionally go to the river and ride tubes. Jason and Nick always had a couple beers, but I was more focused on building muscle so focused on protein shakes. Anyways I usually wore a one piece bathing suit, but this time decided to wear my bikini for the first time since May. Although they had already noticed the increasing size of my shoulders, my cousins mentioned that a six pack was becoming visible. Of course boys will be boys, but they said I should be in good shape for season.

A few weeks later it was time for me to get packed, and for the first time since May I tried on my jeans. I’m convinced they were shrunk in the wash because not only were they impossible to button, but looked a couple inches short. What was weird is that my size 12 shoes also felt small. Maybe my body had changed after being outside all summer? Jason said he had a pair of pants from high school that, “would never fit me again” and I could just borrow them. Wearing sweats, my flip flops and a Knox College sweatshirt I started driving to college.

After a whole summer in the country, it was a real treat to have a fast food meal during the drive. (It’s not like I needed to restrict calories anyways.) One of our local favorites is a place called Culver’s. I ordered a Triple Butter Burger with cheese, large crinkle cut fries and a Chocolate Oreo Concrete Mixer milk shake. Sure it was a couple thousand calories, but who cares? It’s ok to have a cheat meal every once in a while. Anyways after ordering I went to the women’s rest room. I did my business and was washing my hands when I felt a tap on my back: it was an old woman who said that next time I should use the Men’s Room. I turned around in horror to look down at her and pulled off my hood. She looked at me for a second, and then asked with surprise, “But are you a woman or a transexual?” I told her it was none of her business, but I did happen to be born with female plumbing. She turned bright pink, and left the restaurant shortly. I picked up my food, and sat at one of the booths. I noticed that there was a guy waiting for his food who looked about my age and was wearing a Knox college sweatshirt. I nibbled on my fries, and he looked a little familiar, so I made eye contact when he turned around picking up his order a couple minutes later. We started chatting, and I started teasing him for just having a salad and diet coke. Turns out he was also a freshman, and was going to be on the Cross-Country team. I looked at him with a little confusion…back in high school all the endurance athletes I knew were super skinny, and he was a bit bulkier. Apparently despite following his coaches training program, a summer job at an all you can eat amusement park added 20 pounds to his 5’9 frame. I then looked at those eyes and asked if we might have met earlier that summer. Horrified he then recognized me, and said yeah he still would be the biggest guy on the team. I then told him about my bulking diet, and that I wondered how much muscle I had put on. We laughed about both bulking, and had a nice conversation as he enviously watched me enjoy the burger, fries and milkshake. Turns out we both came from the same part of Minnesota, and we talked about carpooling to save gas money during breaks. Eventually it was time to break, and we then stood up. It was at that moment that I realized I might have grown taller that summer because the 5’9 guy who was the same height when 5’11 me slouched was now clearly a couple inches shorter. As we walked to our cars, he asked me if I had grown over the summer and I told him he did look shorter but I would not measure myself until with coach on campus. I noticed that his shorts looked quite tight and were filled with two nice round gleuts. We agreed to hang out on campus sometime soon, and got back in our cars.


At practice the next day, coach gathered all the freshman for a weigh in. Wearing just our panties, I was a little nervous to see what would happen. Coach decided to weigh people in order of height, so that way hopefully the weights would go up with each person. My formerly 5’3 teammate had grown an inch in height…and spent the whole summer sweating up a storm. She was trying to run 50 miles per week, and had gotten down to a healthy 122 pounds. At the end of the group coach measured me, and was surprised to learn that I was now a solid 186 cm or 6’1 and 151 pounds. At first that sounded huge, but I was still almost ten pounds lighter than my new friend on the Cross-Country team.