From Agatha With Calories

Chapter 1 - Sundays Watching Disney+

First Month: 196 Pounds

Looking back at that moment I now realize that some trivial facts can be detrimental not to hold on to. "It's totally Agatha!" Steph screamed as I dropped my Moxie all over my favorite pair of blue jeans. I could barely hear her say "I'm sorry Sweetie, let me help you," before I jumped off the couch to keep the seat of my pants from getting wet. "It's fine, it's fine," I said and walked into the kitchen to grab another soda. I laughed as a character's words from an old Twilight Zone flashed through my head, something crazy about vixens and a computer that got jealous over its scientist seeking a girlfriend. I shrugged off the thought and hurried back to the living room because Steph was determined to watch the entire first season of Wanda Vision before the day was through and had strictly banned pausing. We had just got into the first episode before she figured the whole series out. "Jack!" she yelled, "Agatha is totally the villain. I know it!"


Second Month: 204 Pounds

I was sitting on the couch with Steph, watching one of the new Star Wars series on Disney+ and trying to brace myself for the moment she decided to pry into my new diet again. Eating Dominos every day for every meal seemed like a great idea when we placed our bet, but holy cow, was I starting to see the world through marinara lenses. Luckily she got obsessed with the backstory of the Darksaber and let me be.


Third Month: 213 Pounds

"Man, am I glad that I don't have to eat Chipotle for every meal for an entire year," Steph smirked, "It's like a dream getting to eat free Dominos everytime you're around." "Don't mention it," I sighed, "What are we going to watch today?' She glanced at my middle and nearly giggled, "Flubber."


Fourth Month: 221 Pounds

I had to start getting Dominos from multiple locations. I found out that the employees at the shop closest in our neighborhood had started to add extra ingredients to all of my orders.


Fifth Month: 230 Pounds

"Did you bring Lava cakes? I lava Lava Cakes," Steph asked as I lumbered in front of her TV. "Yes, of course I did, I lava them too, ' I chuckled with a sigh.


Sixth Month: 238 Pounds

"Oh my god, I'm getting so fat Steph, this is ridiculous," I cried after I came back from the bathroom with the loss of my jeans button. "You look great honey, don't worry about it, let's finish Cruella and I'll bake you some cookies."


Seventh Month: 246 Pounds

I felt like a different person. And every time I saw Steph, she baked me something delicious. When my belly bumped into the steering wheel I felt a sense of dread wash over me of how much more it would expand in five months time.


Eighth Month: 253 Pounds

I started wearing sweatpants to movie nights with Steph. I don't know which was more fattening, a picture perfect memorization of the Dominos takeout menu or Steph's new love of baking.


Ninth Month: 261 Pounds

We were watching an old Xmen movie the day Steph finally asked me the question. "Hey Jack, watching all of that new heft on your belly, I've really been wanting to touch it," she said all big-eyed. "Can I, can I, please? I really want to touch your belly," she giggled. I gave in a little too easily I'm afraid, "Yeah why not."


Tenth Month: 270 Pounds

Credit card maxed. Sweatpants sized up.


Eleventh Month: 277 Pounds

"Hey Jack, want to lick the cake batter off the spoon before I wash up?"


Twelfth Month: 286 Pounds

"Merry Christmas!" Steph shouted as I walked in the door. "I'm so excited to try your gingerbread cookies this year, I feel like I could eat an entire gingerbread village, I'm so hungry," I said as I smiled and tried to squeeze past her. "You look it," she said with a wink as she jumped on me with a hug that made my whole body jiggle. "I just love what our bet has done to fill out your ugly Christmas sweater" she said with a smile. "Stop Steph, I feel huge! I've gained ninety pounds over that wicked Agatha bet, how'd you know she was the bad guy?" I cried out as I pulled down on my tight Kermit sweater. "Just a hunch," she said, "Ready to finish the first season of Loki?" I grabbed a handful of cookies and plopped down on the couch. "Yeah, I'm really excited," I smiled. She grinned at me and asked, "Want to make a bet that the Time-Keepers aren't even real?"