Chapter 1 - The Dreaded Number

I’m skinny! I swear, I’m skinny!

What do you mean, do I still fit in my size 4 jeans? Of course I do! What kind of question is that?

See?! I still have them here. Let me try them on to prove it to you.

Huh? They must’ve shrunk. That’s weird. It must be because I haven’t worn them in so long.

And what do you mean? I’m not wearing a thong. You perv. Those are my regular panties. They’re just small… just like me. And I promise those didn’t shrink too.

And my bra? Why do you ask? I told you earlier, I wear a 36C. Always have, always will. No, I’m not going to try it on for you. Gosh, you can be so weird sometimes.

No, I’m not going to show you more of my clothes. I’m really tired all of the sudden. I think I need to sit.

Shoot, I forgot to grab the cookies before I sat down. I know I’m not supposed eat sugar, but it’s a cheat day. Can you bring the vape too?

Babe, I can’t reach the coffee table. I’m sitting at a weird angle or something and my stomach hurts when I lean. Can you move everything closer?

Sorry, I had to lay down. I got too high then finished all the cookies. I’m so full. Can you rub my belly?

I said rub it! Why are you sloshing it around like that? What do you mean that’s just how it is? I swear it’s firm! Why are you laughing?

Sorry I got upset. I want to take a shower. Can you run it for me?

Yes! I can get up by myself. See, if I raise one leg up first, and swing it down, I have the inertia to get myself up. It must be because I’m so high.

I’m gonna get in now! Can you leave me some clothes to put on after?

What are these? Why did you bring me such big clothes?! A 46DDD bra? Are you insane? Size 18 jeans? And XL panties?

Why would I wear these? They’re not going to fit? Fine! I’ll prove it to you. Why are you so stubborn sometimes?

Uhh.. what’s going on? They fit perfectly. Is this a prank? Did you swap the labels?

What do you mean, I’ve gained some weight lately? No I haven’t!

I don’t know what you’re talking about. My thighs don’t rub when I walk. My belly doesn’t hang 3 inches down my panties. My ass isn’t forming a shelf. My fupa isn’t covered in stretch marks - what even is a fupa anyways?

My belly isn’t covered in stretch marks either. Neither are my hips or thighs. My arms don’t look like the lunch lady’s and I certainly don’t have 3 chins! Why are you being so mean today?

I’m 120 pounds, same as always. And I’m only 5’1, it’s a really healthy weight, I swear!

Why are you smiling like that?! Get me the scale, I’m not arguing about this.

200…?! What…?! Yeah, I can do the math. I gained 80 pounds. I guess I’m overweight now, huh? Did you just call me obese?

Fine. Get me more cookies.