Chapter 1

Saturday, 20th September

Today I got an unexpected but welcome email from Sarah left in my inbox. Upon opening it I saw that there were no words in the email but I could see there were two photos attached so I opened the first.

The first was of her on a set of scales where you could see a little bit of her belly and a tiny amount of one of her thighs at the bottom of the pic. Most of her feet and of course in red writing the scale saying two hundred and a half pounds. The second was of her just in her panties standing in her room with both hands on either side of her pudgy belly. She looked so soft in the picture and I wished I could be there with her now, so I imagined just that for a while in my room.

Two hundred pounds just seems so much better than one hundred and ninety seven, even if it is only three more pounds.

Monday 13th October

I seem to have turned into a fourteen year old again, I am scared to go for the woman I really want for fear of ridicule. So I have found myself online more often looking at all things fat related on the internet. I also seem to be keeping an eye on all the women in my classes that have put on weight since university began and those particularly those who still seem to be.

I really need to kick out of this and either front up to the fact I like BBWs or go back to dating skinny birds because this just is not healthy.

Saturday, 8th November

Could today have been any worse, I guess it could no one died or anything, but it was a shocker all the same.

The first thing I noticed as I woke up this morning was I was sporting quite the hangover from the night before.

“Ryan what were you doing with your tongue down the back of that girls throat last night, she was huge.” Nathan one of my housemates said.

I was struggling to remember what he was talking about, when I finally started to recall. Towards the end of the night we had been dancing and I had got a little grove thing going with one curvy cutie and eventually we went off to get a drink together and then I played a bit of tonsil tennis. I had not thought of her as very big she was probably only just the size Sarah was at the start of the summer. It was certainly though different to the usual woman my mates would have seen me with.

“Oh, I don’t know, but it probably has something to do with this headache I’m sporting.”

“Tell me about it, I’ve already had a couple of paracetamol.”

Later I found her mobile number she had given me, there was no way I could call her though if people were going to take the piss out of me for it, so I screwed it up and put in the bin.

This evening received a text from Sarah to say that she would not be in touch very often as she had found a new boyfriend. I know we are not a couple but it is horrible to think of some other made putting his hands all over her chubby body, especially those forty one pounds I helped her with.