chapter 2

By the end of the semester, I had gone up two pant sizes. I even had to buy all-new shirts. I could tell some of the people at school had been talking about my weight gain behind my back. However, I didn't mind my soft, fat body. I liked waking up and feeling the softness of an empty belly, and then stuffing it full before I got to school. By lunch time, there was room for more. I tended to eat less at the cafeteria, so I didn't attract attention. But this meant that I was ready to pig out by the time I got home from school.

Unfortunately, Eric was spending less time with me, meaning I had to pig out on my own now. He had started dating a girl in our class named Jenna. I had never really though her and Eric to be particularly close, even though I'd known her for years. They had almost nothing in common. She was athletic and popular, while he was more of a chubby nerd. However their relationship persisted. Eric was losing weight, I think due to Jenna's assertiveness. He told me that this was the first time he had been under 200 since junior high. I didn't tell him that I was possibly close to that weight.



After graduation, I spent my summer before college at my grandma's house in Arizona. She was losing her sight so I helped her out around the house, cooking, cleaning, and running errands. But it was so hot in Arizona. I stayed indoors most of my summer. And because I was in charge of the kitchen, I was able to cook anything I wanted. I knew that I had gained a bit more weight by the time summer was over, but I was still denying it at some level.



Before I left for University, I was very busy and so Eric and I only had time to hang out once. I was glad to see him again after being away all summer, but I also felt a bit gloomy since we were heading to different schools. As I pulled into his driveway, I couldn't help feeling butterflies. I wasn't sure what that meant. I was greeted with enthusiasm as we reunited. Something was different though, there was a tension, I suspected in part because we both knew we wouldn't be seeing each other for some time.

Although he and Jenna had broken up some time ago, Eric had surprisingly lost even more weight while he was gone. I was happy for him because it seemed to make him happy. But it did send a small wave of disappointment through me. I missed the feel of his big belly when we hugged. I missed the curvature of his chest.

"Gosh April, you look..." he trailed off, "you look really nice. You look so happy. Did you get a tan in Arizona?"

I blushed. "Oh stop!"

"Seriously! But you always have had that special glow."

"Well, you look good too. How much weight have you lost? You look almost like a different person!"

"I lost 40 pounds."

I swallowed. That was the exact amount I had gained over the year. "Wow how did you do that?"

"Um, I guess just watching what I ate!"

I nodded. "Well that's good for you then."

He laughed. "Yeah, I guess you're the fat friend now" he teased.

"What?"

"I& apos;m just kidding!"

"No, that's rude!" I was genuinely shocked.

"No, like, you look really good."

"You said it like I'm gross," I snapped.

"April," he plead, "please forget it."

"Whatever."

&q uot;I thought you could take a joke."

"No, I'm kind of sensitive about this, ok?"

"I'm sorry..." he said.

The rest of the night was kind of awkward. I wasn't sure if I had overreacted. But it didn't matter. Soon I would be at University where no one remembered me as a thin girl. I could be fat and enjoy myself.