Chapter 2 - enter the donut lady

And I need to discuss those Krispy Kremes, and specifically the place where I buy them, a little gas station/food mart -- and even more specifically the woman who sells them and how darned seductive she makes eating these donuts (and getting plumper) seem. I don't know her name; I just think of her as the donut lady. Now, I guess I should clarify something. I love looking at women of size, even women who have just a bit of flab on them. I enjoy their every movement, their fat rolls are like a feast for my eyes. Their love handles and bellies hanging over their pants really make my day. Their hips, their thighs, mmm mmm mmm. I love to see them move, shimmy, shake and jiggle. I view these women with wonderment, and given the chance, I often compliment their looks discreetly.

Would I be unfaithful to Annie with any of these lovely chubby women that I see all around me? No. I appreciate their appearance and their curves and their moves the way art lovers go crazy over certain paintings and sculptures, the way horsebreeders or car-lovers go insane over horses and cars. I enjoy looking, but I know that what I have with Annie is the ultimate in enjoying sexual desire and fulfillment. And what we have goes way beyond sexual fulfillment. It's life fulfillment, and I am not willing to endanger it with a romp in the hay with some plump stranger, no matter how enticingly grabbable her love handles look. I am not looking for sex with any of these lovely women. I just like drinking in their lovely attributes with my eyes. If you think there's something wrong with that, I'm sorry. That's just the way I am.

Along the same vein, I really enjoy seeing a beautiful woman get even more beautiful by putting on some weight, by obviously enjoying herself and plumping up to perfection. That is, if she seems to enjoy doing so and is not worried about what society thinks about her packing on a few pounds. Unfortunate and unappealing is a woman who is fat and unhappy or disgusted about it; just as unfortunate is a skinny woman who deprives herself of enjoying delicious food. There have been several happy weight-gaining beauties I have watched over the years, and they just grow lovelier as time goes on, and as adipose piles on. I love seeing them grow fatter and happier.

Anyway, back to the donut lady. Over the winter, I had developed a taste for donuts, and a couple mornings a week, I stop in to get some. Now, Krispy Kremes are the manna from heaven for donut-lovers. I like the ones with chocolate on top and creamy middles -- that's kind of how my middle is getting, a little soft and creamy. You are what you eat, they say, and I'm definitely getting that cream-puff look, all doughy and soft. And maybe a little sweeter.

About a month ago, I noticed that the donut lady had been getting a bit plumper lately herself, adding a roll of softness under her obviously tighter outfits. I often wonder if those I know and see on a regular basis survey my weight gain in the same way. Do they check me out like I do the donut lady and others who are gaining weight? Do they evaluate how big I've gotten and am getting? Do they note to themselves that I suddenly have a little obvious gut sitting atop my waistband? And that it wasn't there before? Do they see me eating more than I ever did and think about me letting myself go to pot? Huh, I wonder. A few have made little comments about my gaining weight. Surprisingly, a lot have said that I look better now that I've picked up a few pounds.

I keep digressing. Back to the donut lady again. I had thought about asking the donut lady if she was pregnant since her belly had started to stick out so prominently. Really asking was more of a fantasy I guess than a real thought, actually. If a woman is not pregnant, well, that could be a pretty awkward question. The donut lady and I have sometimes just chit-chatted about this and that, the weather, politics, whatever. But I started to wonder if she is pregnant or getting fat. There is no discreet way to bring up such a question.

Years ago, I remember seeing young expectant mothers wearing comical t-shirts which said, "I'm not fat, just pregnant." I've often thought someone should make t-shirts saying, "I'm not pregnant, just fat." Haha. That would end any embarrassing questions. Anyway, concerning the donut lady's condition, I kept my mouth shut -- to speak that is. I certainly opened my mouth wide for her delicious donuts, and lately, just about every kind of food which is fattening, often buying candy bars and breakfast biscuits also at the food mart. All because, I think, the chub-gaining donut lady made plumpness look so appealing, so desirable.

She is probably an inch or two above five foot tall, and she might weigh about 140 now; when I first started buying donuts there back in the winter, she was a little thinner, about 125 with a little soft belly. Her arms and legs remain very thin; only her belly seems to be growing. She is probably about 35 years old, and she appears to be getting a really sweet middle-age spread. Although her belly has bulged so much that I kept obsessing about whether she might just be pregnant.

Here was our conversation at the counter a few weeks ago (Note that I decide to bring up my love for donuts!) --

Me: I think I'm getting addicted to these! I can't stop. I have to come by here almost every morning and get some. I used to just get one, then two, and today, I've got three.

Donut lady: Yeah, they're great! They're an occupational hazard for me. I'm already on my second one. (She turns around and points at half-eaten donut on counter behind her) I ate five yesterday.

Me: (Taking a chance, thinking I could learn more) Lord, if I ate that many each day, I would weigh a ton. You must have really fast metabolism. Or do you exercise?

DL: That's sweet of you to say, honey. But the only exercise I get is when I exercise my jawbone, eating donuts. I'm not exactly Brittany Spears, you know. (patting her belly)

Me: Well, I never thought much of twigs like her, anyway. I like women with good appetites and some curves.

DL: (laughs) I come by these curves honestly (again patting her soft flabby little belly). You know, some customers even ask me if I am pregnant. I just tell them, "Heck, yeah, pregnant with donuts." (laughs) I don't give a damn what anyone thinks. If I'm fat and happy, so what?

Me: (laughing too, and getting more than a little excited by this discussion) Well, I like your attitude.

DL: Yeah. (She picks up her half-eaten donut and takes a bite) These donuts are killing me. One day, when it's quitting time, they'll just have to roll me out the door. That is, if I can even fit through the door.

Me: I'd like to see that (laughing. Then suddenly, another customer comes up behind me.) Well, I need to go now. How much do I owe?

DL: One-fifty-three.

Me: (I look at my hefty fattening "breakfast" -- three creme-filled donuts, two egg biscuit sandwiches, a large semi-sweet chocolate candy bar for a midmorning snack, and a large coffee). Are you sure?

DL: Yeah. (She leans over the counter a little to whisper, and I notice a delicious roll of flab sticks out a couple inches over her jeans waistband) I'm giving you the donut addict's discount. Hee hee. We donut lovers need to stick together. Come again for more.

Man, when I left there, I couldn't eat those Krispy Kremes and biscuits fast enough. Such talk and her belly-patting really worked on my appetite. And I have continued to return regularly to the food mart for more, noting now the donut lady's own love for these delicious treats. One day, she even had some chocolate smeared on her cute bulging cheek. And another day she had chocolate across her tummy, smeared across a red tight stretched tanktop. Her outfits often emphasize her belly. One day she wore a dress, against which her midriff bulged wonderfully, testing the strength of the fabric. And she has been true to her word, giving me a discount, not counting the third donut, or sometimes, just coming up with some random low price. She'll wink and rub her little belly sometimes. I imagine that's the Krispy Kreme addict's secret signal.