Chapter 1

Steve Morris’s phone had been ringing off the hook all morning; every morning for a month if he was truthful with himself. Bill collectors were so relentless. If only they could see that he spent his day in his home studio trying to put some kind of masterpiece onto canvas—kind of hard when he’d just discovered that the woman he’d wanted to marry was sleeping with his best friend. He considered them both persona-non-grata at this point, which meant changes in life plans, lost sleep, inability to concentrate, loss of appetite and no commissions coming in.
The phone rang yet again, and this time it was Steve’s agent, Ted, calling to remind him that if he did not get himself together soon, he’d be dropped from a couple of magazine contracts that he’d gotten for cover art. Steve looked around the room as Ted droned on and on (like Charlie Brown’s teacher) in his ear. Everything in the room reminded him of Louanne, his ex, or his old pal Justin. The whole house was a domain they had all shared some good times in. These were supposed to be heartwarming memories, but they were just a reminder of what was lost.
Steve heard the newspaper being delivered and when his agent finished pontificating, he went to the porch to retrieve it. For whatever reason, he was inspired to open the classifieds. It was there he saw the ad that would change his life: “Climate Change has reduced our crops. Amish family is offering room in our home for anyone seeking a peaceful lifestyle in a tranquil environment. Call Katie’s bakeshop in Paradise to inquire.” Steve called immediately, agreed to the almost ridiculously reasonable rent that included all meals—but no utilities since it was an Amish farm—and listed his house for rent for a tidy profit.
In Paradise, Katie Miller grew more excited as she and her parents prepared for the artist to come and stay with them. They’d never rented out a room before, but as the elder Millers grew older and Katie’s business thrived, they were unable to farm on the scale that would support the household. Katie never had brothers and never met anyone she was keen on marrying. All the men in the community worked long hard hours. Katie wanted a man who stayed home and who she could pamper. Her parents thought this artist, Steve, was going to help on the farm. She had other ideas. She wanted someone to try new recipes on. She wanted to see him eating her baked goods constantly and eating her mom’s home cooked meals. She had dreamed of owning a bakery. Now that dream was accomplished, she wanted to fulfill her fantasy—to push someone into to upper limits of obesity.