Chapter 1 - She doesnt know his name yet

Hiya. My name is Amanda. I just left work for my lunch break. Instead of going out somewhere, I've just been going to the cafeteria downstairs because I went there with a friend a couple weeks ago and the cook there is super ***in cute. I think it's pretty obvious that I'm into him because I always try to make sure he sees me so I can smile at him. And sometimes he smiles at me! Honestly, I can't tell if it's because he thinks I'm cute or because he's just being nice. I also kind of enjoy the food there, too. But I can't tell anybody that, it's cliché at work to hate on the cafeteria food. But at this point I'm just getting the same thing nearly every time, a grilled cheese with bacon and some French fries. And Sprite, I love Sprite. Huh, today the lady at the register upgraded my Sprite to large for free, that was nice of her. She said it's because I'm the only person in the office who has started paying attention to the cafeteria staff. It also looks like I have more fries on here than usual, that's never bad either.
So I guess I was hungrier than I thought, I ended up eating everything today. Which, I guess, isn't that bad, it was just a little more. But usually it leaves me very full. Maybe they've been leaving me a little less full recently. I doubt that, and I'll deny that until the day I die. I probably should get a salad tomorrow, though.

Today, I did get a salad! I told myself I'd be good, and I actually was. I'm in line waiting to pick it up and pay right now. I smiled at the cook (I still have no idea what his name is) but he didn't smile back. I wonder why... Maybe he thinks that a salad is a sign of weakness... ***, I don't know what I'm thinking, that's so stupid. He's probably just got something else on his mind. Wow, another large Sprite! Looks like that's going to be a daily thing now. Alright, so finding a seat is the exact opposite of different down here. However, I like to find a seat with a good view of the cook. Which I did today! So once I sat down, I glanced up at the cook to make sure I could see him, then I poured the ranch dressing on my salad. Holy shit, that is a lot of ranch, I absolutely did not expect this much ranch to come out of that cup. I guess I looked really shocked, because I looked up at the cook in shock and now he was looking in my direction and smiling! Whatever works, then.
Jesus Christ, this ranch is so good. I've never had any so creamy or smooth. I think this is better than the grilled cheese. I'll have to start getting this instead. I'm still pretty hungry now that it's gone, though. I'll just get some fries that I can eat upstairs. I ended up getting a cup of ranch on the side, too. I still can't get over how good it is. There must have been more fries than I realized now, too, I was just munching absentmindedly upstairs while I worked and it seemed like it was for quite a while.

So a few more weeks have passed, and uh, I really hate to admit this, but I've been feeling a little bit heavier. I don't even get it, I eat a salad downstairs every day and that's supposed to be the magical cure-all for dieting. Maybe I'm being paranoid because Joe (the cook's name, I finally found out through Jan, the register lady) has started to talk to me in the afternoons. He also gives me a grilled cheese (without bacon) and a little bit of fries if I ask for them on my way back to work if the salad isn't enough. I still eat that ranch every day, too, mmm god, that shit is so good. But whatever, I don't know why I feel so heavy, I just know that I feel kinda bad about it... My clothes feel a little tighter, my thighs spread out when I sit, I feel like I jiggle a bit if I move around too quickly. And I'm only 5' 4" so I think the extra weight really shows, or shows quickly at least. I haven't stepped on my scale recently, though, so I could just be crazy. I think I'm just crazy. Last time I checked, I weighed 118 pounds. Perfectly slightly below average, I think. But it's time for the Christmas party at the office. I guess I only really noticed my body now because I'm putting a dress on that I got in October and it felt bigger then. But again, maybe I'm crazy. Everybody loves tight dresses anyway, right? But I really like the dress, I look great. And fortunately for me, the cafeteria is catering, so I get to see Joe!
At the Christmas party, I found out that the cafeteria is only bringing the food up as we need it, not doing everything there. So I snuck down to talk to Joe. He made me a grilled cheese, a few fries, and a small salad! I got myself a large Sprite as well, just taking the usual. I love that food, and Joe knows it. He always makes it special, or at least I pretend he does. He also baked me cookies to take home for Christmas! I ate one (maybe two) at the party and it was awesome. Maybe it was cruddy, but I don't care if it's from him. I didn't have anything to do on Christmas day, since I'm pretty far away from my family and don't always get to go down to see them, so I ended up just eating all of Joe's cookies. I didn't eat anything else, though, so I should make out ok for the day. *** it, I'll drink some wine too. Or a bunch of wine. We'll see how tonight goes.