Chapter 1

In the late 90's there were two places to go find other folks into weight gain. There may have been more, but Dimensions Weight Board and the Fat and Gaining chat on AOL were the two that I remember the most.

It was in that chat room where I met Jill, who I would later on call my wife. But back in 1997 we were chat buds. She was one of the first people I talked about feederism with and we would share links to weight gain stories. All of these stories focused on women getting very fat. Jill was bisexual and always said she saw herself more as the feeder type.

Jill was a big girl and in her own words an "aspiring dominatrix". She would say this half joking but the truth was that she was very dominant. I loved this about her because I myself was very submissive.

We got to know each other very well over about a year of chatting online. We had a lot of the same interests, same taste in music and literature. We also found each other attractive. When we met in person we hit it off even more and it quickly became a romantic relationship. The only issue was distance. Jill lived about two hours away in Bakersfield,CA while I was in Los Angeles. Our first trip together was a BBW bash in Las Vegas. Jill made me promise not to mention any feederism stuff because in her words it was "very taboo" in this circle.

We were both in our mid- 20's but Jill seemed a bit beyond her years. She new exactly what she wanted. She once said to me "I want a short pudgy boyfriend I can domme. Is that you?

"Absolutely I said." Short and pudgy was actually a good description of me. I'm 5'7 and back then I was about 200 lbs. I never worked out ever. In fact I had never even worked out in a gym. I was not very good at sports. I was slow. But Jill thought I was gorgeous and that's all that mattered. Jill was nearly double my weight at 390 lbs and a few inches taller than me. She was intimidating and I loved it.

Jill once asked how much control I was comfortable with. I told her I wanted her to control everything. This drove her wild. I became her boyfriend and her sub. We experimented with mild bdsm and with chastity.

After about a year Jill asked me to move in with her. I liked the idea of being in a new town and being closer to her so I agreed. I found a job rather quickly and we settled into our life.

The dom/sub dynamic of our relationship got more intense and I loved it. Jill told me what to do and I'd do it. I was to mow the lawn, clean the house, and do any projects around the house. And I was to do all this while wearing a chastity cage.

The first time I put on the cage it drove me wild. I felt completely owned. I had to earn my way out of it. But once I did the sex was amazing. Jill twas twice my weight would often pin me down and squish me. Everything about our sex life was top notch.

Around this time we barely talked about feederism. Now and then we would share a story with one another. And Jill was part of the online BBW community. I posted online as well and still occasionally chatted in the weight gain related rooms. At this time I considered myself an FA.

If I had to point to one specific incident that changed the direction of our relationship it would be the time we met up with Jill's friend Olivia and her husband Joey. Jill hadn't seen either of them since their wedding which was five years prior. So when they invited us over for a BBQ we gladly accepted and thought it might be a good way to meet some people.

When we got to their house the first thing I noticed was how big Joey was. He was sitting on the couch and when we walked in he stood up and he had a very big belly apron. Jill seemed completely flustered. The whole day she seemed to be completely enamored by him.

When we got home I asked her why she was acting weird.
"He was half the size last time I saw him," she said. "Gosh he must be over 400 lbs."
"Maybe shes feeding him?" I said.
Jill said it was very unlikely because of some comments Olivia made about his weight. We would later learn that Joey's weight gain was a big factor in them getting separated a few years later.

A few weeks after our visit with Olivia and Joey I had noticed that Jill seemed preoccupied during sex. She said it was nothing at first but I pressed her and she finally admitted something.
"I've been playing with myself and fantasizing about you getting as fat as Joey," she said. "It's all I can get off to lately."
I was caught off guard and at the same time it turned me on. For years I had read weight gain stories and being as submissive as I am I had always pictured myself as the feedee. But I had never acted on it or even discussed it with anyone before.

The next day while we ate breakfast Jill apologized and said it was something that could remain a fantasy.
"It doesn't have to be," I said.
"Are you sure?" she said.
I told her that I was. That I couldn't stop thinking about it and that we could stop at any point anyway.
"Maybe I woudn't want to stop. That's the thing," she said.
"Would I still have to mow the lawn and clean the house? I said.
She laughed but I wasn't joking. For a lazy guy like me the chores were the bane of my existence.
"We'll get a gardener and a cleaner," she said.

Later that evening when we were in bed she pinned me down and gave me the new rules.
"You're going to eat as much as I tell you and when I tell you. No, you don't have to do all the chores. But. you're going to wear your cage and you will earn getting it unlocked by eating and getting fat for me."

I agreed. I couldn't not agree. I had been thinking about this a lot longer than I had confided in her.