Chapter 1 - Prologue
Imagine, if you will, a house. Regular, unassuming, and nestled deep within suburbia. This house is everything you may stereotypically expect: a multi-bedroom, single-floor ranch style home, complete with green lawn and white picket fence. And for good measure, imagine that several carbon copies of this home exist up and down all the way down the block.This house is so bland, you’d be forgiven for never having registered its existence, even if you’d been staring at it for multiple hours. And, for the sake of argument, let’s say you had done exactly that. Even then, you could probably make the successful argument that the home lay vacant, ready for a family of 4 to simply spring into existence and take up residence.
In fact, the only counterpoint to that line of thought would be the appearance of delivery people, at pretty much regular intervals throughout the day (and sometimes at night too, but hopefully you haven’t stared at the house that long). And no, not just any old deliveries, but food deliveries, from every junk establishment the human mind has ever dared to dream of.
And this, you imaginer of homes you, belies the one interesting thing about this house - the woman inside. Her name is Sadie, and for the sake of a polite introduction, let’s just go ahead and say that she’s… not a petite lady. Now let’s see what she’s up to.
At that very moment, Sadie eyed a carton of melted butter. Well, it had certainly been hot and melty an hour ago, but she worried it was starting to solidify. Shrugging it off with the light concern of last week’s weather, she grabbed one of the twelve small burgers she’d just had delivered and dunked it right into the calorific semi-liquid.
11 burgers later, Sadie’s moans of satisfaction came loudly as she massaged her full, enormous belly. All this to the rhythm of loud, deep breaths, whose frequency and depth could only be associated with the morbidly obese. And yet, duty called.
There was still a little butter left in the container, the rest being in her belly or on her face and hands, and one burger remained. With the Herculean effort of an action movie hero making one last stand, Sadie grabbed the burger, dunked it, and drew it toward her drooling maw…
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