Chapter 1- Jamie

The bright screen’s light was starting to bother Jamie’s eyes, and she was already wearing those nerdy blue light glasses. She glanced at the tiny time reported in the corner. 1:88? For a second she thought she might have slipped into another dimension. That would have its pros and cons. Pro: she wouldn’t have to submit the application within the hour. Con: she wasted all that time and wouldn’t even have the chance at the opportunity. She refocused her eyes and could see it was actually 1:33 in the morning. She had time to revise her application one more time thoroughly. She didn’t like to think of herself as a perfectionist, but other people certainly did. She just liked things to be correct. Like bridges should be made with the correct configurations or else they collapse. If you don’t put the correct gas in your car it can ruin it. If a guy didn’t have the correct body type and sneakers, they had no business showing up on the date. It was ones like the last one that people didn’t seem to get behind her on.

When it came to dating she was particular, and not in the ways people thought she should be. As a middle aged and inarguably beautiful woman, it seemed that other people had plenty of preferences for who she should find to be suitable partners, which always seemed obscene and patronizing to her. Her parents always lamented her passing up the handsome athletes she had associated with when being a sports manager for her college football team. This feeling intensified when she later managed to become the part-owner of a minor league team. Her friend's father had owned it and in his declining health “sold” it to his daughter who went into business with Jamie. Having already been so involved with her college team, Nell decided to let her take more of a front seat in the business side. Nell preferred the social media aspect to running a team. They had the staff in place where the team basically ran itself, yet Jamie found herself hanging around more than she needed to be, especially wherever the defense guys were.

Many would have thought it was to hang out with Johnny, the defense coach, whom she had an amicable break up with over a year ago and remained friends with. She had tried dating outside of her type, unsuccessfully. Johnny was a little bit younger, but she didn’t mind that really. It was his general presence. He lacked substance, desperately. He was very much the practice what he preached type, and he encouraged the boys to eat well and obviously strength train. He wasn’t jacked, but slim and muscular. Plenty of women could appreciate that. Kill for it even. But Jamie was just so unimpressed. She couldn’t help that she wanted for more.

She was pretty reserved about it, but she craved fat men like nobody could imagine.

Double chin to kiss
jiggly arms, bubble butt, bite
Overhang for grabs

The haiku of her soul? Kinda. But, she said yes to going out with Johnny and they had a good time. He was funny and easy going, but ultimately the attraction was one way. He was a great friend, the news of which he took quite well.

“Listen you don’t have to give me a reason,” she remembered him asking a little after they decided to stop dating, “but, I can’t say I’m not curious why we didn’t work. We get along so well.” She thought it was a fair inquiry, but she didn’t want to tell him all the reasons that piled up so fast. On a movie date he got them a medium popcorn to split. He hugged her and they didn’t make full contact with her body. He made no noise at all to tie his shoes. It in fact got quieter in the world when he popped down in an athletic squat to adjust the loose laces. These all just small reminders of the fact that he was just too skinny for her. And it used to feel wrong to her, but at this point in her life, at the stellar age of 37, she was over-reserving others' hypothetical feelings for her own immediate ones. That was up until the point it would make her life uncomfortable. She had managed to get to a very nice rhythm in her life, aside from the solitude. Yet, she didn’t want to hurt Johnny and felt he might be able to handle knowing the truth.

“I’m attracted to fat guys Johnny.” It wasn’t eloquent or fancy, but it wasn’t laden with euphemism like she had done in the past. Typically it would lead to people not knowing what she was trying to tell them, all because she was too embarrassed to say it outright. She had been meditating on that one in her Yoga class. That always made her feel a little scandalous, to be trying to insight a sexual rebirth and identity intervention amongst women thinking of likely more ABC Family stressors.

Johnny had laughed for about a second, but quickly seemed to realize it was the perfect explanation. “So it wasn’t my teeth?” he asked nervously. She was grateful for the opportunity to laugh. Johnny had perfectly normal teeth, but when you were so “perfect” she imagined you had to find insecurity somewhere. She assured him he was a great guy and handsome, just for someone else. He let her know it would be easy to get over her fast, because she had been the worst he had ever had. This too made her laugh. Jamie knew she was an exceptional bang, but would not deny she felt completely awkward the one time they had sex. It was like she didn’t even know what to do with her hands, and she didn’t want to find out. It was bad for everyone, and she was happy about that.

So it was kind of nice having Johnny to confide in and talk about her interest, even if it didn’t come close to the full truth. They’d get lunch and a big guy would walk by, and she enjoyed his asking, “Even that guy?”. His tone was that of tickled amazement, and she liked to think it emphasized in his mind how he could never be enough for her. She really liked to think about it, actually.

She looked back at the time and had a quick moment of panic. 10 minutes left. She was sure it was perfect, but to waste the time she had felt wrong. Even if she wasted a massive amount of time thinking about her massive obsession ….of massive men. Not that the application was unrelated to that obsession.

She had been forwarded an opportunity to “professionally develop” her skills and knowledge of business management. It was part of some women in business initiatives. From what she could tell she would be able to take two of her players abroad and immerse themselves in the sports culture of another country. There would be seminars for her to attend and things like that, but ultimately an excuse to travel. She couldn’t ignore the possible chance to meet a gorgeous plump stud and have a fling. She had met up with a few gentlemen over the years, some she still met up with annually, but always casual and no strings attached. Always amazing sex.

She just hoped she could go. She eyed the clean looking responses to the questions, her resume on steroids, and the headshot they requested. Dark hair falling off her head like sharp cliffs. No heat could get it to curl for more than an hour. She usually pulled it back. People said it made her look too serious, which only encouraged her. She smiled brightly, but not fully. It was her LinkedIn picture, but she thought it said, ‘Hey I’m nice. Pick me, please’, exactly the right amount. Maybe the judge would think she was pretty and do just that. Although she couldn’t ignore how anti-feminist that was to want. She rescinded the wish. She hit send and didn’t think about it again until Nell called her 2 weeks later.

“What is the International Women’s Conference stuff? I have a crazy packet I’m looking at. Some letter? ‘Congratulations you’ve been selected-” Jamie cut her right off. She hurried right over to their office and went through the packet. “Where are you going?” Jamie was hurriedly skimming the letter to find that exact information. It jumped out at her and she didn’t know exactly what she thought.

“Japan?”

“Oh wow that’s cool. Whatchya gonna do there?” She speedread the rest of the letter. She wasn’t sure why it hadn’t crossed her mind. Who assumed the whole world played soccer. Maybe cricket? But she wasn’t expecting…

“Sumo Wrestling?” Jamie slumped onto the couch.

“Isn’t that, like, perfect for you? Or are you over dating fat guys?” Nell laughed when she saw how unentertained Jamie was. She scrunched her freckled face at her friend and pouted her lips.

“Hmmp. I’m getting a dream come true and I complain. Who am I?”


Jamie eventually overcame the initial shock, and was excited to leave. She had to select two of her team's players to participate in the conference as well. They would get to train and compete with the partnering athletes. She felt weird about asking a couple of guys to come become a sumo wrestler, especially because of her specific interests, but she had at least one player in mind to ask. Austin was a defenseman who she had taken a slight interest in. After the break from last season, he was reported to have gained 25 lbs of fat, and there was no question where it went. Two words. Gut. Butt. Jamie found him so delicious looking, when just the last season she didn’t even really notice him that much. He had been cute. Heavier naturally, but his belly lacked the luster she needed. It didn’t even scream potential to her. But now, she was noticing him, and noticing his appetite was the culprit. When the team had lunch at the facility, he often got seconds or thirds, which was allowed, but the players were not necessarily encouraged to get fat, to her great dismay. She was more than curious what the sumo shadowing would do, because she didn’t know much about the sport, but she was pretty sure there was plenty of encouragement to get fat.

Austin was happy to be invited and took no time to think it over before agreeing. His smile beaming out displaying dazzlingly white teeth, with a charmingly crooked tooth on the top left. He wore his hair in a modern faded crew cut with dark brown hair partying on top. The look she thought only highlighted his jawlines softening. She had gathered a happy go lucky way about him and thought he would be both adorably chubby and pleasant travel company. She told him there would have to be another player to go, and asked him for a suggestion. She figured it would make it more fun for everyone if the two guys got along well. He easily picked out his friend Carter, who Jamie certainly had never paid any mind to. He was one of the more fit defense guys, who rocked an unapologetic blond bob he wore back with a Nike athletic band. Huge shoulders and a thick triangular body. Hot she supposed, in theory. He seemed a bit cocky for Jamie’s taste in men, but she wasn’t trying to date any of them.

And she had full intention of following that one wisp of a rule. Moral compass. But there was a complication. They decided to take a 3 week cruise from Canada to Japan. Jamie was terrified of flying, and in an attempt to make it seem like a fun vacation before a work conference vacation, she suggested going by sea. She wanted them to enjoy it, since it was certainly a more time consuming form of transportation. But the guys seemed to think the trip was getting better each time she talked to them about it. She explained that they would need to do some studying before they get there, and the cruise would be a great time to cram. And she wouldn’t realize how true that was.

Carter and Austin did the training modules together and were getting into the idea of being actual sumo competitors. They learned about the sport and all the traditions it was drenched in. They didn’t have any idea if they would be any good, but what else did guys in their late 20’s have to lose? It was really not until midway through, she wandered up and found the two of them at a table on the outskirts of the buffet, right by where the steaks were getting carved. She sat down with them, wondering what they were laughing like idiots about. She quickly didn’t care when she saw them both eating so heartily that she was starting to suspect someone had told them about her more private peculiarities and were trying to embarrass her. It almost made her instantly furious, but she knew she kept all her sexual stuff under meticulous lock. Pin protected. Which made her feel compelled to ask them what had gotten into them after they had gotten 3rd plates since she sat down. They had clearly been there a while by then.

“Jamie. Isn’t it obvious? We’re bulking up for our big debuts,” Austin said pleasantly. He had those little trusting chubby cheeks that she wanted to nip. She stayed and ate a salad, watching the two monsters enjoy two additional plates of dessert. By the time they were ready to leave, both had massively stuffed bellies. Even Carter’s gut was drawing her eye to it. They invited her to get a drink, but she didn’t think she could handle that on top of everything else. She wished them a good night and went right to her cabin. Locked the door and furiously masterbated to the images she collected in the last hour alongside her fantasies about them getting massively bloated at the bar.

She could admit to Nell and Johnny that she liked fat guys. That wasn’t that hard. But saying she wanted to see them stuff their faces until they felt they would burst? Feed them directly? How can a person let that come out their mouth? Aside from her interactions and meetups with feedees from the internet, she had told nobody. It was liberating to have had those experiences, but it was not something she could expect from others outside the community for fat freaks like her. Which is what made it so shocking to see both boys putting one of her fantasies on like a minimalist play. Upon finishing the 3rd time, she realized the next week would be a challenge. And then she thought about what was waiting for her when they were stepping off the ship. She was getting hot again and exhausted.

Jamie had committed to fully avoiding the boys, which unfortunately meant spending less time in the buffet area. Therefore, she was not able to peep any of the hot thick men who may have been around too. Austin and Carter were constantly there. Sometimes she would see them laying out on the deck by the pools, their stomachs nearly trembling from stuffing themselves. It was hard to even be around them like that. She had tried asking if it was necessary to be eating so much for Sumo, and they proceeded to give her a lecture on the physics of the sport. They were going to be starting on the smaller side, and that put them at a disadvantage. They already had an obvious lack of experience counting against them. Easier to move and less power and skill to force a tank sized opponent out the ring. They also had learned that the athletes only ate twice a day, an idea that horrified them both. They were going to get their fill of crappy American food while they could. She was going to have to come to terms with the fact that both of them were going to be getting fatter. On purpose. Before her eyes. She wasn’t mad. If anything, she was worried she wouldn’t be able to resist the temptation.

It was their last night that she finally started to come undone. Jamie had invited them to drinks after dinner, dining separately, of course. She, at this point, could not stand to see Austin stuff his fat little face, without swallowing him whole. Carter was first to express how much he was gonna miss being on the boat. Austin agreed, mostly missing the food. They each had had 3 drinks when Austin, somewhat shyly, announced that he was going to grab something else to eat. Carter seemed like the type to try and embarrass him for it, but he hopped up too. Jamie couldn't shake the feeling that she had made Austin nervous about eating so much. He and Carter had been destroying the buffet for weeks, and he didn’t seem shy then. Jamie tried to make her mind slow down. She could feel her excitement rise by the breath. She couldn’t help but feed on his soft feelings. He was cute. And something in her, the drinks no doubt, was making her feel like she should shoot her shot. Even if it could make things very awkward. She could blame her sloppyness on the alcohol, which wouldn’t be far off. She could not let go of the chance that he’d be into her too and all the help she could give him on developing his craft. She had a decent feeling it could go well. She caught the whiff of a crush on him.

The boys returned and Austin sat heavily on the curved booth, before shifting in to give carter space. He shoved the table an inch or two away. “Who moved this?” he joked laughing, but faltering when he looked at Jamie.

“You moved this dude,” Carter hollered, swatting the back of his hand on his friend’s gut. “Do you know how much you’ve gained? I can’t imagine less than 10!” Austin blushed. Jamie felt herself burning to know.

“You don’t think you are fatter too?” he shot back, friendly.

“True,” Carter said, taking a fat bite of lasagna. “I mean we’re supposed to be getting big. Right, Jamie?” She was so entranced in the conversation, she felt caught off guard to be pulled in so suddenly.

“Uh. Well I mean you guys did the research. If extra weight is going to help you experience the sport, I say go for it,” she let her eyes find Austin’s for a moment. Then an intrusive thought came through her, and she hardly ever acted on those. But she felt her lips open again. “I think it would be a good idea to maybe get some starting weights to give them when we arrive. How about after we head down to the gym and get on the scale?” It came out assertively and Carter nodded as he chewed, excited to see where he was. But she noticed the shift in Austin. He was clearly anxious about it, and that was like blood in the water for a shark. Maddening.

“Let's just go now and get it over with” Austin said putting his fork down. Jamie nearly caught it.

“No finish. Don’t let me stop you guys.” Jamie offered a casual smile, electing to begin rambling the itinerary for the morning. She kept an eye on them both and was almost fluttering with the joy of encouraging them to keep eating. And the fact that they did it. She could hear Austin’s breathing get more labored next to her and she wondered if he could go all the way. Carter announced he was going to run to the restroom and Jamie saw no better opportunity. “You okay?” she asked, sweetly.

“Yea. I ate way too much,” he sighed.

“You only have a few bites left though,” she suggested, trying to sound innocent and zero percent lusty. Based on his response in his face she guessed some slipped out.

“You think I should push through?” he asked, maybe a little surprised. “I don’t know I’m so full. I don’t know what’s gotten into me. I just don’t know when to stop.” He said it looking down at his gut and when he met her eyes his cheeks pinked up.

“Why not until you can’t?” she said. He swallowed hard, and she took that as an invitation. She scooped up a mass and offered him the bite, which he took willingly. She fed him the last 4 bites he had left and put down the fork with satisfaction. He puffed in an attempt to breath but was interrupted by a huge overstuffed belch that sent a rush through Jamie. Carter walked up to the table and gawked at him.

“You’re a serious pig, Austin. Just shameless.” Austin nearly melted into the floor. Jamie was waiting for him to out her for feeding him the rest, but he didn’t say anything.

“Lets argue about who is going to be the best at this wrestling thing later,” she said, scooting out of the booth. Austin hauled himself out as well, accepting Carter’s help onto his feet.

They made it to the gym and Jamie was jumping out of her skin. She had Austin’s last recorded weight chiseled onto the slate of her brain, obsessing over the number and its inaccuracy. He couldn’t be 280. No chance. And that was taken after his gain over the off season. She had been weighing him with her eyes for weeks and kept getting a different read. She had to know.