Chapter 1 - Part 1 chapter 1

"Look at me" he grabbed her face. She couldn't look at him - not now. She wanted to leave, run, hide, anything but sit here in front of him.
"You're drunk Ezra…just calm down" She said, glancing at him. He was restless and she could see the pain in his eyes, the hurt, the rage, the meltdown about to happen. "Tell me you love me...please" he kept saying. She wanted to console him, she wanted to make him feel happy.

"I love you baby, just relax, go to sleep - everything will be fine" He walked into the kitchen, she got nervous. It was never a good sign when he walked into the kitchen at 3 o'clock in the morning upset like this. She knew what was coming, she knew his habit. "A ***ing family reunion, my ***ing ass!" He screamed as he pulled item after item out of the fridge and cabinets. She backed up, he was losing his mind over this upcoming family reunion; His family is dysfunctional in every sense and it affects him even now. She didn't gain over 200 pounds by herself - it was nights like this that forced the weight on her. He scares her when he gets like this, his whole body is tense, the muscles on his chest, back and arms are taut, and his eyes look darker than their usual dark blue. She begged him to stop, to relax, but what else could she do? she knew the only thing that would calm him, and thats to binge feed.

She placed her hand on her stomach unconsciously, defensively, cautiously; she knew he was coming for her. He came around and told her to sit at the table, she did. "Ez.. if you just get some sleep, you'll feel better about the situation tomorrow. We'll talk to Rachel or Kim, I'll work it out" she pleaded with him. He ignored her and carried leftovers from the nights before. She fidgeted with the table's frame as he made his way over. She was wearing nothing but a pair of panties and one of his large T-Shirts, which already was getting a little tight for her. He sat down, and with no hesitation, he began unwrapping a half eaten double cheeseburger from Five Guys. He pulled his chair in front of her, and pushed the burger to her lips, she looked at him desperately, she didn't want this, not now.

"Open your mouth now" He said determined, he was ready for any resistance.

"Baby... you don't have to do this. I'm not hungry, I'm satisfied really" she tried.
He pushed the burger into her face again, relentless, there was nothing she could say to stop him.
"So help me Bella, if you don't open your mouth and eat this" it was deadly how he said it.

She opened her mouth, and the burger passed her lips, she bit into it and lost herself all over again. She chewed and moaned a sigh of defeat. She closed her eyes and a small whimper escaped her as she finished the next couple of bites. Soon the burger was done and he lifted a spoon of creamy macaroni to her lips. She took it in and every bite after that, moaning. Then came the small bits of chicken pot pie they made on that Tuesday. The spaghetti got messy, bits of sauce stuck to her double chin, lips and lower cheeks as he fed her forkfuls of it at a time. He pulled closer and kissed her spaghetti smothered lips gently, licking her chin. This was his drive, his escape, his comfort - feeding her into hedonism. She looked into his eyes, the dark brooding hurricane had melted away. She sighed relief as he pushed a forkful of jerk chicken into her mouth. They continued like this for an hour, his right hand shuffling mouthfuls of food into her and his left sneaking under her T-Shirt, he grazed the soft stretched skin of her lower belly, unconsciously following the lines of her stretch marks.

"Please..." she breathed. "No more..I can't finish please.."

"I know"

"…Stop"

"I will. When you're satisfied" he pushed another forkful of moist coconut cake into her mouth

"Ez..." she barely got out. Her breathing was labored as she begged him to stop, he wouldn't. Small tears fell down her face. She leaned forward in a way to protest but her gut got in the way, a lash of pain stirred in her, she winced and panted.

"Let go of fighting this Bella, you are not done" He pulled her shirt up, and pulled her belly out of her panties. She whimpered and closed her eyes again, instinctively kneading her overstuffed gut. This was too much for her, she wanted to stop, she needed to stop before she burst. He brought another piece of cake to her lips and told her to open, she lifted her heavy arm to protest, pushing at the fork but he pulled it down, "You know you want this, thats why I won't stop, I won't let your fears stop you from what you desire and need".

"I don't want this...stop Ezra!"

"But you need it!" He shouted back. What was the point? she asked herself. What was the point of protesting, arguing, fighting with him when in the end, she knew her fate, she knew he'd push every last crumb into her. She was too fat to fight, to full to protest and a part of her knew he was right. She needed this satisfaction just as much as he needed it, this relationship was bent on the hedonistic desire to pleasure each other, whether it be against what that person wanted at the moment.