chapter 1

I’ve always had this fetish as long as I could remember. Seeing people get fat was a fascination when I was young now it’s my reality. I always kept the urges down grabbing the skin on my stomach pretending it was flab but never actually gaining. I was thin and hot in high school and the beginning of college then junior year hit and I was in a relationship and gained the typical happy relationship weight. That paired with medication cause my 5’3” self to go from 117 to 180 and I felt fat but I wouldn’t let it get the best of me because I had always been thin. Truth be told I loved being petite skinny and hot and getting any guy I wanted. I wanted to go back to that so paired with my newly diagnosed adhd which gave me an adderall prescription I began to lose. Now an important point to note was I was embarrassed at my high weight I had this fetish but I didn’t take pictures of myself I hid and when I caught a glimpse of myself fatter in pictures as I began to lose I was still turned on by the weight gain but knew I couldn’t stay that way. I got my weight back down to 140 senior year of college and I was back I wasn’t as thin but I was now curvy with a thin waist. I was ecstatic I was back to my old self I could get any guy and I felt great until I had a thought that I never truly got to experience my fetish. I had up to this point been fantasizing about when I was bigger and stuffing myself on occasion but overall hiding my true thoughts that I wanted to be fat and not just fat but bigger than I was before I wanted to hit 200. One day I weighed myself and saw the scale reach 161 I’d gained 21 lbs and not even noticed. I saw the flab that had returned to my gut and I was so turned on. I realized how much I’d been eating in the month I gained the 21 lbs and the amount of weed I’d been smoking and it all clicked. I realized I needed to do something to get this kink out of my system I decided I’d hit 200 that magic number and I’d be done I’d lose it and I would be happy. Little did I know that wouldn’t be the case... I went in full throttle I got on fantasy feeder and Reddit posting pictures of my small belly with pictures of how I looked before as comparison. I got comments and chats and it began to become an obsession to get bigger. I remember drinking cream the first time it was in my fridge and I thought it was so high calorie it would add weight fast and I was right. I gained 8 lbs in a week. I chugged 2+ pints a day that week and by the end of it I felt heavy and so turned on. I was getting distracted by my belly at work and pleasuring myself multiple times a day because I would notice how fat I was and need relief. I kept going like this and got to 180 my gut was huge my face had a permanent double chin my back had rolls and I was out of breath all the time. I decided I should stop it was becoming too much so I took a break. Although it wasn’t a break because I still was eating like a pig and trying on old clothes and seeing how fat I was I just didn’t post my body online or talk to anyone about it. I weighed myself after a month and I was 187. I was fat and I realized that I couldn’t just stop because I wanted to be fatter I was so close to 200 and I knew it wouldn’t be enough. That was a week ago and I’m back to stuffing myself daily and chatting with people about my gain and how fat I’m becoming. I realized that there is no stopping me because the more I gain the more I want and the gain feels amazing. Honestly everything is just so tiring now because I’m not used to these 70 extra lbs. I can’t cross my legs or bend like I used to because of the fat in the way of everything. Bending over and putting on my shoes is hard because my stomach fat gets in the way. I literally get so out of breath that I can’t breathe just doing small things. There are weird things you notice when you get big like rings and bracelets not fitting. I have fat creases on my neck and I get so sweaty with no effort. I’m getting acne all over my back and some on my face. My legs are constantly rubbing together and that sexy tattoo on my side that looked hot when I was thin, that’s gone because of the rolls of fat I’ve gotten on my sides. There was no creases on my back to start then one on my back when I was chubby. Now there’s two and a third is coming. My back is just so puffy and my shoulders and upper back are getting covered in fat which I didn’t know could happen. I’m just super slowed down with everything. When I gain it’s all in my gut back and face which makes me look fatter than I thought. When I started this I thought I might gain like a plus sized model gains because I was curvy to start. That’s not what happened my fat piles on everywhere my shoulders are round my collarbones are gone and my neck is no longer thin and long. My cheeks were always a bit chubby but now they cover my eyes when I smile. My weight has gained on my upper body and belly like crazy and that belly that started cute and small hangs over the top of my underwear and whatever shorts I wear around the house. When I first rented my apartment I thought a spiral staircase was brilliant it would go with my cool girl aesthetic. Now it’s flat out awful because walking up those stairs to my kitchen and bedroom everyday causes me to break out in a sweat, struggle to catch my breath and feel like my heart is going to explode. I used to go on hikes regularly now my friends ask and when I go I constantly stop and hold them back because I can’t keep up with my fat body. I think the point that has really stuck with me is when I try to get some action. I went out the other night to have drinks with friends and like up until then I’d still been getting guys but it’s definitely stopped off a bit. One guy I was with since February who had stated he loved my fat ass flat out said I got too fat to fuck. My gut was constantly bouncing and he couldn’t stay hard. When I went out I just began to realize how fat I am compared to my friends it’s crazy and I got some weird looks in the outfit I was in. Now yes maybe my skin tight shorts and fishnets were hot but my gut was huge and my open back shirt showed the rolls all over my back. I was drinking a beer a heard these two guys talking about my friend I was with and that one wanted to ***. There was a comment about how hot she was and the other guy said dude go for it but I won’t entertain her fat friend that’s beyond me I mean her back is covered in rolls who wears a shirt like that out when you’re obese like that. I heard that and immediately excused myself to the bathroom I looked in the mirror and saw myself I was red faced from sweating and the makeup couldn’t hide my acne. My cheeks were puffy and my second chin that merges with my neck was on display. My tits looked almost small compared to everything else about me and they’d always been big. My stomach had begun to push down my shorts and when I saw my back covered in rolls sweat and acne I knew... I was fat borderline obese and I wanted more. I rushed into a stall to finger myself because I knew that was the only action I was getting and when I was done I came out and said to my friend “Hey I’m hungry let’s go get something to eat!”