Grant never gets it right (full)

chapter 1

*Huff*

*Huff*

*Huff*

"Th is...is the last time I help clean out someone's attic," The rather buxom blonde Brittany would say with exaggerated sigh after toting around box after box of old and withered cardboard boxes from her best friend Tiffany's dusty old attic, no longer having the will to work such physical labor a step more she would drop the last remaining box at her feet on the attic floor with a noisy clatter of the box's contents being jostled about.

"Careful with that box please..." The somewhat less buxom, yet surprisingly even more blonde woman Tiffany would call out from the bottom of the rickety old ladder steps leading to the attic, soon climbing up to join her friend after hearing such an unexpected racket from the floor below.

"Why? It's just old junk, probably stuff that's already broken anyway." Brittany would say, crossing her arms in a Huff with scoffing breath and a dramatic roll of her Barbie doll eyes.

"I know, I know. It's just my grandfather's old war stuff is all. He gave me a call this morning saying I should be really, really careful about moving that box,"

Upon hearing that Brittany immediately jumped away from the box on the floor like it was a bomb that was mere seconds away from blowing up the entire house sky high and to smithereens.

"D-Did he say why?"

"Well...at first he was explaining vaguely, then he started mumbling something about ghosts, then he started wanting some banana pudding...I think at that point he just forgot the conversation we were having."

Brittany would scoff aloud again now feeling like an idiot getting scared by a simple box that even it's owner couldn't explain what was inside it. Admittedly this only sparked some slight curiosity in her now wondering what small, potential treasures could possibly be plundered from a war veteran's possessions. With raised eyebrow Brittany would reach for the box in an attempt to unfasten the thin and flimsy tape keeping the box closed when Tiffany suddenly swatted her hand away like a bothersome fly.

"Yeowch! Hey that hurt!"

"Serves you right, you shouldn't go and look through someone else's belongings. Besides, you said it yourself, it's probably just old junk anyways."

"Oh come on~ Like you aren't just as curious as I am of what's inside? Could be something really valuable, something you could possibly sell to help pay for that new designer handbag you've been wanting~"

Tiffany would look down at the rugged box for a moment before looking back up at her friend with a mixed look of both annoyance yet still peaked interest.

"God you are a horrible influence on me, okay...I guess just looking to see what's inside wouldn't hurt anyone,"

"Atta girl, come on, help me with the tape."

With that said the pair plopped right down to their knees and worked together, combing their efforts to peel off as much tape as possible. The box having just so many layers of tape it was as if someone was trying to make sure it would never be opened again, and apparently actual chains and locks wasn't an option at the time. Regardless, the box would finally open and it's mysterious contents would come spilling out onto the floor of the attic with one quick lift against the side of the box as both Brittany and Tiffany were met with a face full of rotting dust particles floating up to their faces to greet them.

"Oh man, whatever it's in this box totally reeks, I can't tell if that's the dust or a dead body." Brittany coughed and gagged aloud waving her hand in front of her face in an effort to clear her nasal passage of any discarded dust bunnies left dancing about in midair.

"Probably just the stuff, it is the old man's veteran World War II junk after all. Just look at it all," Tiffany would say with a sense of awe in her voice, her hand reaching down to rummage through the many dirty yet memory rich trinkets from the box.

"Ugh, at this point I kinda don't want to anymore, everything just seems to be covered in gunk and mold." Brittany would groan softly before soon picking up something that grabbed her eye, it was buried deep near the bottom of the medium sized junk pile and by first glance apparently it was just a small household ornament of a lamp, probably no more than a typical novelty purchase or a lazy attempt for a meaningful gift. "Hey, does this look like it belongs with any of this stuff?"

"It's a literal pile of old veteran junk Brittany, I don't think any of this stuff belongs anywhere else except the attic...why? What you got there?"

Brittany would hand over the lamp looking object over to Tiffany who started to closely inspect it for just a moment when Brittany started to smile a bit coming up with an idea.

"Hmm...is honestly does look like one of those genie lamps, you know, like in the movies?"

"Heh, yeah...I guess it kinda does. That's pretty neat."

"Yeah, hey you should rub it. Just to see if maybe it's actually the real thing and a genie would actually come out of it and we could get wishes, just for laughs."

"Oh grow up Brittany, there is no such thing as genies, although I will admit there is some more of that weird old gunk on it..."

Tiffany would then take the next few moments to swipe her bare palm across the side of the withered brass lamp again and again in an attempt to scrape away the gunk on the side of it, only to jump back at the sigh of a strange purple steam now starting to flow and slowly leak out from the spout end of the lamp. That leak soon became a rocket of strange and mystical purple steam covering the entire floor in seconds as the two blondes quickly embraced each other, trying to stop each other from shaking in fear of what could possibly be creating all that steam. A sudden booming voice roaring from within the small sea of purple smog

"WWWWWRRRRRRRRAAHHHHH!" It would bellow leaving Brittany and Tiffany to cower and tremble with more fear filling their hearts to the brim.

"Wh-What is that!?" Brittany cried out clasping Tiffany's wrists tight with an iron grip for dear life.

"I don't know!" Tiffany would say back, unable to see pretty much anything else beyond the veil of clouds but the obscure outline of something humanoid like slowly emerging above the smoke.

"WWWWWRRRRRRRRAAHHHHH- (*Normal voice*) AHHH! Ow, ow ow ow, woo, geez...talk about a pain in the neck. Serves me right, you want to take a short nap when no one is looking and you end up paying for it right after." The voice said as the mysterious figure soon revealed himself to be....a genie?

It was a genie, a mystical looking man with a mild case of missing his own two legs but made up for it having a long wisp like tail of magical purple clouds, a real life genie. After a moment of silence trying to process all this, it was Tiffany who spoke up first.

"-Wait. Did you say a nap?"

"Hm? Why yes, I did. Why?"

"But, this is my attic, and you came from a lamp that was in my grandfather's old war veteran junk."

Seeing the genie's once somewhat relaxed and serene expression now severely puzzled and even a bit tense hearing this, Brittany decided to chime in with her own questions.

"...How long did you think you've been asleep for? What year do you think this is?"

"I...I don't know, it was 1941 when I fell asleep, I don't remember anything else after that....holy shit, have I really been asleep all this time?"

Tiffany and Brittany would share a quick glance with each other before giving an unconvincing and uneasy smile at the genie, which only made him feel even more out of place.

"Wow...I must have missed so much, I wonder what the world is like since I have gone. I....I gotta see it for myself! Always figured this gig was overdue for a vacation anyway! Haha!"

With a snap of his fingers the magical being would dawn on a typical vacationing tourist outfit of a Hawaii floral pattern bowling shirt, a rainbow lei around his neck, sunglasses, and a straw sunhat in a quick flash of light.

"Welp, it was fun meeting you two but I got places to be and a whole new world to see!"

"Wow, you are magic! WAIT! Before you go, since we were the ones that freed you....aren't we supposed to get wishes?"

"Yeah, you owe us. Ain't that, like, the rule or something?"

"Hm? Oh! Right! Right right right, of course. Been asleep for so long and you damn near forget what manners are. How rude of me, here, let's start over shall we?" The magical being would say before quickly snapping out of his clothes with another flash of light and cartoonishly stretching out his hand towards Brittany and Tiffany. "Evening, you can call me Grant, Grant the Genie."

Despite being a bit surprised by how animated this being was, both women would shake his hand respectively greeting him.

"Brittany,"

"Tif fany,"

"Grand, and a pleasure to meet you two wonderful ladies and I would be more than happy to grant you three wishes in exchange of the kindness of freeing me."

"Awesome!" Brittany shouted with glee, softly jumping up and down in place like an excited child about to receive a toy.

"Cool! Wait, three wishes, as in three wishes each? Or....?" Tiffany would ask out of curiosity, which admittedly made Grant look a bit curious himself putting a hand to his chin.

"Well...I'm afraid the rule is 3 wishes can only be given to whoever finds my lamp, and since you both technically found me at the same time...."

"We both only get..." Brittany began, soon looking over at her best friend.

"...Three wishes." Tiffany finished, now looking back at her.