Lawn Boys

Chapter One - Box Truck

I pondered at the large box truck backing into the neighbour's driveway and open garage. A man comes out of the garage, approximately in his 30's and 5' 9". He stands grabbing the first few boxes the uniformed movers give him.

He has black hair and hazel coloured skin covered with a pair of grey sweatpants and a white shirt which has sweat under his armpits, neckline, back and a small bit above his small pouch belly.

I averted my gaze back to my work and continue working, waiting until the man's done to welcome him to the neighbourhood.

My wife Jenny and I make our way to the neighbour's front door. Jenny clutching a small fruitcake and I, a casserole.

Jenny knocks on the door with her free hand, and it opens to see our new neighbour, Fred. He was very happy to receive the food and chat to us.

We met Fred at the HOA meeting regarding some random neighbour 4 cul-de-sacs down was trying to introduce a racist measure a few days after he bought the house but, it was good to get to know him 1-on-1 without a racist screeching about the neighbourhood character and 'other' people.

Jack, Jenny and I talked all things about the neighbourhood for 25 minutes until Jenny advised. "Jack and I have to go Fred; we have to make sure the kids aren't destroying the house" Jenny states

Fred replies "I'll come to yours next time. Rover is a sleeper" he points at his sleeping sausage dog.

We laugh and leave the single-story ranch house. Jenny and I came back home and did the same old, same old.

Jenny asleep in our king bed. I made my way out of the bed to go. Passing our daughter's room and I looked outside the hallway window to see Fred's lights still on I continue downstairs making a bee-line to the kitchen.

Standing shirtless grabbing snacks and treats from the fridge and pantry. To fight the craving grabbing snacks and sitting on the leather couch in my boxers and gripping 3 different snacks and placing them on my beer belly.

I finished eating and throw out the now empty packaging and now looking at my stomach protrude out a bit further than it already does and lumber up to bed.




The next morning was spent mowing the lawn like every Saturday morning. Riding the mower over our lawn and Mrs. Grady's lawn who was the elderly neighbour in-front of Fred's house.

I drove the inactive mower over the road towards Fred's parking it on the road next to his driveway to see him working on sorting out his filled garage and box-packed possessions. I got a bit heated from the spring sun and take off my shirt. Showing my beer belly glistening with sweat.

"Hey, Fred!" I exclaim to make him hear me with his headphones on. "Yeah, Jack." he states back.

I get off the mower to him. Asking "Do you want me to mow your lawn?" Fred looks at him and states

"Yeah, but bud I'll need to do something in return because the fruitcake and casserole were amazing and I already feel in-debited to you and Jenny." he chuckles

"Maybe pizza in return. Jenny and the kids are doing errands and out for the day." I state.

Fred brings out a hand "Deal." Then I add "I can give the excuse to the missus. About helping you with boxes and all that" then gestures at the boxes, then I pat my sweaty beer belly.

I mow Fred's lawn pretty quickly and sit in the sun and for a quiet moment, just for Fred to drive back on the nature strip. He opens the car door with a big bucket of chicken and states "grab the gravy and a pair of fizzy drinks."

"What happened to pizza?" Jack questions, Fred replies "Chicken was on sale. I am freaky and dip my pizza in gravy... I also got pizza."
I instantly respond with such glee "Dude, I do that too!"

I grab the two pizza boxes and a bag of sides.
Fred and I go inside to sit at his dining table. I had already started chugging a 2L fizzy drink which was refreshing and nice, by the time we got to the dining table, I had already had around a Litre of fizzy drink when Fred and I start eating the chicken the exact second it got in our hands.


The two of us power through half of the bucket of battered chicken and start on the second. Fred and I slow down by the last few pieces and start talking.
Fred and I just clicked as friends. If were back 10 years ago, we'd probably have dated. He was my type in a man and I was more better looking 10 years when I was 28 and just before becoming the epitome of the suburban dadbod stereotype.

Fred was from Seattle and he only moved to here because he wanted a place to move where the property prices were quick growing. He was meant to move with his boyfriend of 2 years who was cheating on Fred before the move.

We finished the two pizzas, had over half of the chicken pieces, drinking the two large cups of gravy and two 2L fizzy drinks. We moved to the couches to deal with our bloated stomachs.

Fred had a small pouch which was pretty slim compared to my beer belly. I weigh around 110kgs which is massive to Fred's approximately 90kgs.
To be fair, looking at him now, his gut's larger than mine on a normal day. So, that's a bit up in the air.
Fred and I were talking for about 9 hours. We didn't even realise until the sun had set and were in near pure darkness. In which Fred turned on the lights after turning on all the lights on the light switch.

We ordered dinner which was Chinese and had the rest of the chicken bucket. Fred and I overdid ourselves once again, our bodies were bound to Fred's couches. We talked for hours more, until I realised it was past midnight and I had to get home. Fred and I said goodbye. I drove the mower back into our 3-car garage shirtless in the middle of the dark.

I plopped onto the couch, too overstuffed and exhausted to walk up the stairs to sleep in mine and Jenny's king sized bed.